Journal Entry – Chapter 2


 “The Choice Is Yours”


     This title rings true in so many ways given the mindset that I have.  True, some of the


things that we say or do are a product of how one was brought up.  As a baby, we truly


do not have a choice on what to believe is right or wrong.  The teachings and beliefs


instilled in me are a true reflection of my parents own beliefs, whether personal or


religious.  Nevertheless, there came a point in my life that a change in my mindset came


to light.  I strongly believe that we have a choice on how life turns out and how I can


choose the direction I would like.  Sometimes things truly don’t work out the way we


want, but does that mean we have to surrender our thought of having no control?


     Some theories presented in this chapter can really be questioned and viewed as more


of an interpretation versus a scientific certainty.  Free Will is one in which I believe we


all possess.  Free Will is something that allows me to make a choice as to the steps and


direction that I want my life to take.  Simply sitting at home and watching Dr. Phil (I


REALLY don’t watch it,) will not channel my desire of becoming a nurse and transform


it into a reality.  I do have to get up and go to class and make a decision that this is the


direction I want to take.  Free Will allows me to choose that path.  Now playing devil’s


advocate, if I had a genetic disorder, I probably do not have the mindset to put together a


plan of attack to make my aspirations come true because of the obvious diminished


mental capacity that would not allow me to go towards that path.  So for me to say Free


Will alone is sufficient, would categorically be incorrect.  That is where I agree that in


some form a predisposition of one’s ability can alter and dictate one own future because


of an inborn characteristic.


     The Locus of Control (internal) is something I attribute to my parent’s insight and


their hopes that being in this country would allow me many opportunities that were not


afforded to them in their country or their generation.  They always instilled in me that one


must count on themselves for all the victories and defeats.  Believing that one outside


person has the ability to maneuver the way I live my life would be something that my


parents did not instill in me.  Given that small history, I believe that has made me adopt


the internal locus outlook describe in this chapter.  I look towards my parents as


wonderful individuals who exhume an internal locus, if not for that, they would never


have left their country to give their children a better life.  Being born in this country


coupled with internal locus that was instilled in me, I became and believed that I alone


can in some way control the journey. 


     In the daily dealings with people, I can recognize those that do not believe in thoughts


being the very engine to our existence.  The mere power of one’s thought, can provoke or


inhibit how one’s day, or even on a bigger scale, life can turn out.  Thought to them is


merely an instinctive reaction versus a controlled entity.  I constantly talk with other


mothers about their children and constantly hear about how uncontrollable their child is. 


I truly feel like standing up and screaming to them that they have the power to control or


alter how their children react; they simply just chalk it up to “Well that’s how he/she is.” 


If only these mothers can instill in their children a positive influence and filter out all of


the negative influences that are in their lives on a daily basis, perhaps they can truly see


how a positive thought process can supersede a negative one.  


     To focus on your language and your thoughts truly is a monstrous task to ask of some


people.  During my younger years (chuckle, chuckle) I did not have any patience and let


all the little insignificant things alter and direct my energy and mindset.  It wasn’t until


later that I discovered that it is much easier and productive to think out certain situations,


and mimic the self-talk approach.  Even without knowing this process, I was able to


weed out the emotions, negative and positive ones, to be streamlined into my daily life. 


Worrying was something that was completely unproductive to me and still remains that




     I recently accompanied my best friend to a one-day seminar hosted by Oprah Winfrey


at Miami Beach.  The premise of it was to enjoy ourselves as women and to seek out that


happiness comes from within.  Just to say it was an Oprah event, we all know what


frames of reference we are referring to.  Over generalizing the event, it encompassed that


all women should find happiness within, to be in control of what our actions are and to


acknowledge that who and what we are today is a quilt of what we have knitted over the


years.  In order to change, if we are unhappy with ourselves, we must learn how to knit


again.  Now to say that the whole event was a crock of #$@@ is an understatement, what


I did learn is that there are women out there (men too), that still do not believe that their


mindset and thought process is a true blueprint to their passage in life.  I found it


illuminating that the class I was taking was putting everything in perspective and


reconfirmed that the paradigm and frames of reference that I read about were in our day


to day lives.


      I believe that there are some emotions that evolve with age.  The way I reacted to


things now are not the way I reacted to them back, lets say 10 years ago, the change that


comes to reacting to these problems comes with the realization that we are who we are by


what we physically do, not by an unexplainable circumstance that alters our lifeline.  I am


who I am because of the tangible situations and thought process that have engulfed my


mindset.  Once we all acknowledge how “in control” we are of our lives, the brighter our


path to happiness becomes.  I have always believed in reacting to the things in life that


we can control.  If we can control it and change it, then do so, if it is something we can


not control or change, then move on.  This chapter has taught me the very same notion


that I have tried to adopt in my everyday life and the life of those around me.  Let’s just


hope that’s enough! J