Journal – Chapter 2



          I think that it is important for all people to have a different kind of personality and be able to express themselves in any way they want, not being afraid of what others think of them.  What I do not like most in a person is when they change who they really are to fit in with a crowd or to enable one particular person to like them.  I knew some people in high school who would change who they really were in order to fit in somewhere particular; although it only worked for a while and then I saw that they were no longer part of that group.  The ability to be unique is the best trait a person can have in my opinion.  Even if it does not allow every person to like you, than that is ok because maybe they do not deserve your friendship. 


I think the big five personality traits (extraversion, neuroticism, openness to experience, agreeableness and conscientiousness) are very true and sum up most people.  I knew many friends who were like all of these and I have to say the personality I dislike most is probably neuroticism.  This does not mean I did not like the person but it drives me nuts when people are insecure and vulnerable because people tend to take advantage of people who are vulnerable.  I do not think I have a problem with insecurity so maybe it bugs me when people are. 


What absolutely bugs me about a person is when they brag about everything, especially to an extent that it makes others feel bad about themselves for not having as many things or opportunities.  I had a friend who just recently moved, although she used to work with me and every time she came to work she always had a different story about what her mom bought her this week or how much money she had. She would say anything to make herself look better than everyone else and toward the end she started to make me wish that I had some of those opportunities.  I now realize that she was not a true friend.  If she was she would realize that other people did not have as much as her and would be able to sense it in other people that when she talked like that it made others feel bad.  Everyone realized it but her, and toward the end, nobody liked her. 


I think it is funny how some people have huge defense mechanisms.  I admire people who do not put themselves in situations where they can get hurt.  Although, if you are always watching and being careful of what you are doing then

can you ever really have fun and enjoy yourself to the fullest extent?  Part of life is getting hurt and if you do not allow that to happen than you could be missing out

on a lot of things, not that they are necessarily good things, although they could be valuable learning experiences. 


          It really amazes me about how a child grows up and its attachment to either the mother or father changes.  I realized how a child is closer to a mother than a father when it is an infant or baby.  That is because the mother cares for it, feeds and makes sure it has everything it needs.  How children fight for either one of their parents attention now makes sense to me, although the whole sexuality part and how children are curious at such young ages shocks me.  I always thought that the curiosity started around teenage years, during puberty. 


          I think it is true that the first five years of a child’s life is important in shaping their outcome.  If a child grows up around hostility and harsh behavior there is a good chance that they will grow up to be exactly like that.  I think every child grows up to be like the person who raised them.  My sister and I are exactly like our mother in almost every way.  We have most of the same values as her and enjoy doing many of the same things she does.  The only way a child does not turn out like their guardian is if for some reason they were not a good role model, and in this instance many people promise themselves to be different than them. 


Observational Learning

I think that I am a very good observational learner.  Once I see something once I could do it again in an instant.  For example when I am driving in order for me to remember directions instead of being told or seeing a map I am better if I see it, even if it is only once.  I like to remember things by looking at a building or stores and make a mental picture of what stands out on them.  I also remember things by putting them in a weird aspect.  I think the weirdness makes me remember something more because it is different than something you see every day.